Resting and recovering

On Tuesday I had a two hernias in my groin surgically repaired. My doctor did not know before surgery if she would be able to use an old C-section scar but when I woke up I discovered that is exactly what she did. I was thrilled because it will probably mean a quicker recovery time with only one incision and none in my groin. I was in surgery for 2 hours and then home about 3 hours later. The doctor will have the mass she removed biopsied for cancer but she told Sewell she did not think it was cancer. I was excited to hear that but I will be even more relieved once I get the lab results. I was a little nauseous the first day but since then I have only had to take 2 Ibuprofen. I must have a high tolerance for pain or I am healing very quickly. Probably a combination of both. The hardest part is just "resting and relaxing" as my dad always says. I am more of a doer than a sitter. I know I inherited that trait. I am getting all my "sitting" projects done and even watching a few movies and doing some reading.
These past few days I have read some passages from my devotions I want to share with you. L.B. Cowman says, "There is another kind of patience that I believe is harder to obtain-the patience that runs. Lying down during a time of grief, or being quiet after a financial setback, certainly implies great strength, but I know of something that suggests even greater strength-the power to continue working after a set-back, the power to still run with a heavy heart, and the power to perform your daily tasks with deep sorrow in your spirit. This is a Christlike thing. Many of us could tearlessly deal with our grief if only we were allowed to do so in private. Yet what is so difficult is that most of us are called to exercise our patience not in bed but in the open street, for all to see. We are called upon to bury our sorrows not in restful inactivity but in active service-in our workplace, while shopping, and during social events-contributing to other people's joy. No other way of burying our sorrow is as difficult as this, for it is truly what is meant by running "with patience." Hebrews 12:1

During these past 2 years I wish I could have taken a "timeout" from life to grieve and process but time continued to march on with no regard for the state of my heart. Time did not stop when I was diagnosed with cancer, when my father-in-love died, or when my mother died. Time did not stop for additional mammograms, sonograms and biopsies to check once again for cancer.

Jesus knew what it was like to bear a mighty grief that was not shared or spoken. He knew what was ahead for him and yet he continued to do the work his Father had called him to do. He brought joy to the multitudes in the midst of his own silent suffering.

I believe there are those of you who are bearing a great amount of suffering right now. As you wait on Him each day, He will give you the strength and power to perform your daily tasks. His mercies are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness. He wants us to come to Him each and every day so He can fill us with himself. His presence will enable us to face whatever the day may hold.

One of the greatest lessons I have learned these past few years is how to pause long enough from my "Martha" tendencies to become a "Mary". Mary was the one who sat as Jesus feet while Martha bustled around cleaning the house and getting dinner ready. When you read this story in Luke 10:38-41 you will see that Jesus says Martha is worried and upset about many things and distracted with all her preparations. He tells Martha that Mary has CHOSEN the better part.

Each day you and I have a choice. We can stop all our busyness and come sit at Jesus' feet, or we can work our way through the day, never pausing to be filled and refreshed with His presence. It is a choice. This is the most critical choice you and I will make each day. What we choose will shape who we are. Do you take time to read your bible and pray before facing your day? Do you give the sorrows and burdens you carry to Him before leaving your house? Does His peace guard your heart and your mind? There will never be enough time to meet with God. The tyranny of the urgent will always try to dictate the use of your time. Be a Mary. CHOOSE WHAT IS BETTER. Then and only then will you be able to run with endurance the race that is set out for you, fixing your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith. Hebrews 12:1-2.

May discipline, quietness, devotion and prayer be what you are known for. Let others draw strength from you as you draw strength from your heavenly Father.

God's faithfulness

In my Streams in the Desert devotions today I read this, "...all the suffering is designed to make me a vessel suitable for His use. And may I remember that His Calvary blossomed into abundant fruitfulness, and so will mine."

I have watched God bring fruit into my life after a season of suffering. I have been able to share my journey with so many people and encourage them to face their own giants with a God saturated soul. I've been able to provide nutritional information I have learned to help others in their fight against cancer. I have also prayed for and with so many that are in the thick of the battle as they look for strength to continue the uphill struggle.

If you are in the midst of a battle with your health, finances, relationships or any other area of life, continue to say,"Not my will but thine be done." Entrust all that you are and everything you have to his Lordship. Let God work in you his purposes through your suffering. Pray and praise your way through the battle. God knows what He is doing even if everything appears to be spinning out of control. Gather an army of friends around you who will be there to help you when the fatigue of the battle seeps into your heart and mind. Let God's word fill you with hope and comfort. It is your greatest weapon in the war.

This fall has brought a season of joy in my life and I wanted to share some of it with you.

I am 2 months into my new job and absolutely loving it. I am able to use all my gifts and abilities every day. I get to organize, create, plan, and inspire. I believe God has used me on my campus to bring about some positive change. If I had realized what good things God had in store for me when I lost my Health classes last year I would have clapped and said HOORAY! Not only do I work in a great environment, I am also working about 20 hours less each week because I am not grading papers or making lesson plans. This has freed up my life to be able to focus on my family, my health and my home life.

There have also been some other positive things happening in our family. Taryn started her senior year and was selected "Best to bring home to mom and dad" as a senior standout. She was also selected to homecoming court and scored high enough on her PSAT test to be honored as a Commended National Merit Scholar which basically means she scored in the top 5% of the 1.5 million students in the United States who took the test as Juniors. She also was given the lead role in the school's fall drama production. She has been a very hard worker and her efforts are paying off! When God showers blessings down on your children it is very fun to watch.

Cori has been attending classes at Cuyamaca and preparing to leave in March to begin her one year commitment to serve on staff with Metro ministries in New York. She has also been invited to join Metro on a 10 day mission trip to assist the Metro branch that is in Africa. She is holding down 2 jobs and serving as a youth leader on Friday nights with our church.

Ashley moves back home this weekend in an attempt to save money. She wants to join an organization that provides a mobile hair school in Africa to help women learn a trade and improve their existing cosmetology skills. We have no idea how long she will be here but it will be nice to have her home, especially since she hasn't lived with us for 6 years.

Chalese is working at a coffee shop and waiting to be called to substitute teaching. Full time teaching jobs are scarce at this time. She recently moved into a new house that she shares with a friend. She is enjoying the additional space she now has. God is using her to minister to people on a daily basis as she has a soft heart and good shoulder to cry on.

Sewell is working hard as an Assistant Principal at Monte Vista and is well liked by the staff. He has creative ideas and is a conscientious worker. His other full time job is trying to keep all of our investment properties from being foreclosed. It has taken every free moment he has. Hopefully we will find some relief and help from the Mortgage companies.

I am waiting for the results of a CT scan I took on Wednesday. It appears that I have 2 hernias in my groin (one on each side) that will have to be surgically repaired. My doctor told me it will be a very painful surgery, which I am not looking forward to. I have had one of the hernias for about 2 years and the other since last spring. I am anxious to get them repaired so I can start training for my track season. On the positive side, I am not facing another cancer surgery.

This is National Breast Cancer awareness month and I look for every opportunity to share my healing story with anyone who will listen. Every time I walk into a store and see those pink ribbons I am grateful to my heavenly Father that I am alive to celebrate my healing! This month I will have another birthday. Since being diagnosed with cancer, these milestones are very important to me. Sewell and I both have the same birthday month. Together we will be 108. One of us is doing pretty good for our age. Can you guess which one? Ha Ha!

I pray this blog today has encouraged you and maybe given you a little hope. Have a wonderful day being loved by the King.

Linn