I've had my share of discouraging moments on this journey. There are times when the weight of it wraps itself around my heart and tries to pull me under. It's a challenge to fight to stay above water and to maintain peace and joy in the midst of discouragement. Often discouragement gives no warning that it's coming. There's no time to prepare. I've found the strength I have from my relationship with God is the only thing that allows me to have victory over discouragement. There are some truths I've learned that I wanted to pass on to you the next time a giant of discouragement walks into your life. Maybe he's already there.
The dictionary defines discourage as "to deprive of courage, to detour, to dishearten, to hinder." Discouragement is a tool that I believe the enemy uses to detour and hinder us from the ministry God has for us. When discouragement comes that's the time I feel like throwing in the towel and quitting. The road ahead stretches for miles with no end in sight. It's a desolate, lonely path full of pain and sorrow.
I've learned that when the giant of discouragement taunts me I have to run to God and find my comfort and protection in Him. He allows discouragement into our lives to cause us to run to Him, not away from Him. God is the only one who can change the situation that brought about the discouragement in the first place.
I've also learned that I have to keep my eyes on the big picture. If you've ever watched a horse race you notice they have blinders on the side of the horses eyes so they don't get distracted by the other horses around them. They are trained to look straight ahead so they can run their own race to the finish line. I know God has called me to fight this cancer and beat it nutritionally and to have ministry along the entire way. So often discouragement will cause us to begin looking around and forget where we are headed. It's easy to get off course. For me when I feel discouraged I usually want to eat things I know would be detrimental to everything I've been doing these past 7 months. Thoughts of donuts and chocolate chip cookies dance through my head. It's easy to give in to temptation when we are discouraged. Your temptation might not come in the form of food but it might come in the form of gossip, anger, bitterness, depression or any other emotion that is counterproductive to the ministry God has called you to. I have often found myself literally crying out to God for His help to resist destructive temptations. A good cry in the arms of God can do wonders for the soul.
I've learned to live out I Thessalonians 5:16-18 where it talks about rejoicing always and in everything giving thanks because this is God's will for us. The word of God has become my greatest source of comfort. Comforting words with healing balm are hidden there. I encourage you to soak your spirit in the timeless truths that are waiting for you there.
The last thing I've learned is that God is always doing something in me, through me and for me! Everything he does is helping mold me into the image of His son. Being a Christian is to be "Christ like". I have become most like Him in the midst of trials and suffering, not when the path is easy and painless.
When I get to heaven I want to stand before my heavenly Father knowing I persevered with His strength through the discouraging times of life.
Today if discouragement is resting on your heart I encourage you to run to God, stay focused on the ministry He has called you to, rejoice and give thanks even when you don't feel like and be confident He is doing something in and through you. Don't give in to the chocolate chip cookies of life. His grace is sufficient for you.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Drawing Strength
Today in my devotions I was struck with the very last sentence L.B. Cowman wrote. She said, "Lord, help me to draw strength today from everything that comes to me!" It's easy to draw strength from those times where we feel refreshing waters washing over our heart and spirit. It's quite a different thing to draw strength from the waves that crash against our lives with deadly force. It's during those times we sense our own inadequacy to stand in the storm. We each have our own storms we face. I'm imagine God longs for us to live our days as if we could not draw our next breath apart from him. We are all quick to run to Him when we feel overwhelmed by the size of the giant or storm we face, but what about when everything is going great? Those are the days we slip out the door without slipping our hand into His. We leave our Bibles unopened on the table and the sound of our voice has not reached Heaven. The busyness of life steals the silence where we hear Him speak. We rush off to face the day unprepared for what it may hold. And the Father watches and waits. He knows that apart from Him we can do no good thing. He knows it is only His grace that is sufficient for the challenges of the day. He knows we can do all things only through Him. Let God and His word be the anchor that holds you fast each day. Look expectantly at your day knowing He has planned and prepared it just for you. Today you can grow more into His likeness if you choose Godly responses to whatever comes your way. Ask Him to help you to draw strength from everything that comes to you these next 24 hours. He chooses your circumstances, you choose your response. Will you rejoice always and in everything give thanks?
I Timothy 1:12 "I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to His service."
I Timothy 1:12 "I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to His service."
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Faith and Love
Last night Sewell, Cori, Taryn and I returned from a six day drive up the coast to San Francisco. We saw beautiful crashing waves, seagulls, seals, otters, a redwood forest, the rolling hills of Napa Valley and an array of sights to be found only in San Francisco. It was a restful, memorable trip that we all needed.
Before I left I had an appointment with my nutritionist. I asked him if he was a Christian and he said he was. I then asked if I could pray before we started our appointment. He reached his hand out and took mine and I prayed. I was not expecting him to pray at the end but he prayed for me. It was very encouraging knowing God has divinely directed me to this doctor. I am praying God will continue to give him wisdom as he treats me. My nutritionist wants me to up my protein and good fat intake. He had me do a 24 hour iodine test to check the iodine level in my body. My thyroid levels are low and the main function of iodine is the synthesis, storage and secretion of thyroid hormone. I have felt for many years my levels are not right. I had thyroid surgery over 7 years ago to remove a large portion of my thyroid because it had a benign tumor on it. Through my reading I am discovering that iodine plays a critical role in the ability for all hormones in the body to operate correctly and for the destruction of abnormal cancer cells. We are waiting for those results. I have asked my oncologist to order more blood work that my nutritionist wants to look at. Please pray she will agree to write the order. My oncologist had to cancel my appointment with her in February and it could not be rescheduled until April 12th. She has never gone over any results with my about my blood work. I am anxious to hear what she thinks. Meanwhile I have been able to get acupuncture and massage coverage through my health insurance at school for only $7 a month. I am very excited because I think the massages will help release toxins out of my body and eliminate the stress that I feel is sitting in my muscles due to this long journey. I was able to get the same coverage for Sewell which should help with his arthritis pain. A specific prayer would be for me to be able to find a good Christian acupuncturist that might be able to help with Sewell's arthritis pain and with getting everything operating correctly in my body. For me it is a journey of continual education. I was talking to Sewell yesterday about when I will feel like there is nothing more I need to do concerning my health than what I am already doing. Therein lies the importance of resting in God and following the leads He brings into my life. Meanwhile, I bought some great cook books to give me ideas on new healthy things I can prepare to eat! The challenge has been to make things my family will eat. They are pretty good about it but most of the time I am making 2 separate meals at night so maybe these new books will eliminate that work. My taste buds have changed because I know this is what God has called me to do in order to get healed but this is not true of my family. It has been difficult to change the years of eating habits I have established and I know it will be equally true of my family.
I am reading David Jeremiah's book Slaying The Giants In Your Life. I believe with God's help I have faced the giant of cancer with a God saturated soul. Each day I am confident this giant is being slayed. You may not be facing a giant of cancer. Your giant may be finances, worry, anger, doubt, jealousy, failure, loneliness or discouragement. The giant of cancer brings with it other giants that must be faced. Two of those are fear and worry. In his book Jeremiah says that fear boils down to disobedience. If the Bible says to fear not and we fear then we are in sin. Psalm 34:4 says, "I sought the Lord and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears." Isaiah 41:10 says, "Fear not, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."
Pastor Jeremiah has this to say about fear, "Your fear level is ultimately a referendum on the closeness of your friendship with God. It's a spiritual yardstick. Do you see things in human dimensions or godly ones? After you spend time with your Creator, you're simply incapable of shrinking in fear at the appearance of every human anxiety. You've seen His power. You've seen His love and faithfulness. The opposite of fear, you see, is not courage. It's not trust. The opposite of fear is love." II Timothy 1:7 says, "God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of sound mind." I John 4:18 says, "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." Jeremiah goes on to say,
"Our Father wants us to leap into His arms... when we're afraid. He wants us to realize who He really is, and that we need never fear. And the key to that assurance is love, the opposite of fear. To experience in full the love of God is to feel the deepest security in heart, soul, mind and strength. Love begins to dispel fear."
I have determined to put my trust in God. Each day I allow His love to wash fear from my mind. I refuse to worry. God is big enough to handle all my problems. I want my life to be characterized by faith and love not worry and fear. I encourage you today to look at your heart and see if any fear has taken up residence. Allow His love to envelope you and drive fear and worry out. Don't let your thoughts take you captive. Every time a thought of fear or worry stands at the door of my mind I lock it out through prayer. I remind myself of God's great love and faithfulness to me. I encourage you to do the same. There is no giant you will face that is bigger than His love for you. No matter the size of giant that has walked into your land, face it with confidence knowing God is standing right by your side. He will place the stones of victory in your hand. Don't listen to the taunts of the giant telling you otherwise. I believe when we get to heaven there will be a "giant slaying party" where we will all tell the stories of God's love and faithfulness as we faced and defeated our Goliaths. I want to be there with my story. How about you?
Before I left I had an appointment with my nutritionist. I asked him if he was a Christian and he said he was. I then asked if I could pray before we started our appointment. He reached his hand out and took mine and I prayed. I was not expecting him to pray at the end but he prayed for me. It was very encouraging knowing God has divinely directed me to this doctor. I am praying God will continue to give him wisdom as he treats me. My nutritionist wants me to up my protein and good fat intake. He had me do a 24 hour iodine test to check the iodine level in my body. My thyroid levels are low and the main function of iodine is the synthesis, storage and secretion of thyroid hormone. I have felt for many years my levels are not right. I had thyroid surgery over 7 years ago to remove a large portion of my thyroid because it had a benign tumor on it. Through my reading I am discovering that iodine plays a critical role in the ability for all hormones in the body to operate correctly and for the destruction of abnormal cancer cells. We are waiting for those results. I have asked my oncologist to order more blood work that my nutritionist wants to look at. Please pray she will agree to write the order. My oncologist had to cancel my appointment with her in February and it could not be rescheduled until April 12th. She has never gone over any results with my about my blood work. I am anxious to hear what she thinks. Meanwhile I have been able to get acupuncture and massage coverage through my health insurance at school for only $7 a month. I am very excited because I think the massages will help release toxins out of my body and eliminate the stress that I feel is sitting in my muscles due to this long journey. I was able to get the same coverage for Sewell which should help with his arthritis pain. A specific prayer would be for me to be able to find a good Christian acupuncturist that might be able to help with Sewell's arthritis pain and with getting everything operating correctly in my body. For me it is a journey of continual education. I was talking to Sewell yesterday about when I will feel like there is nothing more I need to do concerning my health than what I am already doing. Therein lies the importance of resting in God and following the leads He brings into my life. Meanwhile, I bought some great cook books to give me ideas on new healthy things I can prepare to eat! The challenge has been to make things my family will eat. They are pretty good about it but most of the time I am making 2 separate meals at night so maybe these new books will eliminate that work. My taste buds have changed because I know this is what God has called me to do in order to get healed but this is not true of my family. It has been difficult to change the years of eating habits I have established and I know it will be equally true of my family.
I am reading David Jeremiah's book Slaying The Giants In Your Life. I believe with God's help I have faced the giant of cancer with a God saturated soul. Each day I am confident this giant is being slayed. You may not be facing a giant of cancer. Your giant may be finances, worry, anger, doubt, jealousy, failure, loneliness or discouragement. The giant of cancer brings with it other giants that must be faced. Two of those are fear and worry. In his book Jeremiah says that fear boils down to disobedience. If the Bible says to fear not and we fear then we are in sin. Psalm 34:4 says, "I sought the Lord and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears." Isaiah 41:10 says, "Fear not, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God, I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."
Pastor Jeremiah has this to say about fear, "Your fear level is ultimately a referendum on the closeness of your friendship with God. It's a spiritual yardstick. Do you see things in human dimensions or godly ones? After you spend time with your Creator, you're simply incapable of shrinking in fear at the appearance of every human anxiety. You've seen His power. You've seen His love and faithfulness. The opposite of fear, you see, is not courage. It's not trust. The opposite of fear is love." II Timothy 1:7 says, "God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of sound mind." I John 4:18 says, "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love." Jeremiah goes on to say,
"Our Father wants us to leap into His arms... when we're afraid. He wants us to realize who He really is, and that we need never fear. And the key to that assurance is love, the opposite of fear. To experience in full the love of God is to feel the deepest security in heart, soul, mind and strength. Love begins to dispel fear."
I have determined to put my trust in God. Each day I allow His love to wash fear from my mind. I refuse to worry. God is big enough to handle all my problems. I want my life to be characterized by faith and love not worry and fear. I encourage you today to look at your heart and see if any fear has taken up residence. Allow His love to envelope you and drive fear and worry out. Don't let your thoughts take you captive. Every time a thought of fear or worry stands at the door of my mind I lock it out through prayer. I remind myself of God's great love and faithfulness to me. I encourage you to do the same. There is no giant you will face that is bigger than His love for you. No matter the size of giant that has walked into your land, face it with confidence knowing God is standing right by your side. He will place the stones of victory in your hand. Don't listen to the taunts of the giant telling you otherwise. I believe when we get to heaven there will be a "giant slaying party" where we will all tell the stories of God's love and faithfulness as we faced and defeated our Goliaths. I want to be there with my story. How about you?
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Celebrating!
This week I hit 2 milestones. On February 29th it had been 6 months since being diagnosed with cancer and on March 1st it was 6 months since I gave up all animal based products and switched to an all plant based diet.
I have so much to be thankful for. This gift of cancer has radically changed my health. I feel better and look better (so people say) than I have in my entire life. I've lost 30 pounds and no longer say "tomorrow I will start my diet." I feel mentally empowered because I know every single thing I put in my mouth is good for me. I know every organ is being detoxed and getting healthier.
I have been given the opportunity to teach anyone that will listen, including my students, about the dangers of eating all the junk we consume. My own family has started to make some healthy changes. Our 15 year old has not eaten sugar for 4 1/2 months! Go Taryn! Ashley is working at a health food store and is starting to learn more about nutrition and is applying what she's learning it to her life. She is also talking to people who come through her check out line about nutrition and has been able to pass this information on to me. Yesterday I celebrated my 6 months by going to her store and buying some yummy cookies that I can eat that aren't made with sugar, dairy or white flour! Cookies were one of my addictions of choice in my BC days!
For the first time in my life I am getting 8 hours of sleep almost every night. I understand the dangers to the immune system and to the body in general when we are sleep deprived. I no longer get sleepy during the day and I have more energy than I have ever had.
I have learned how to eliminate stress and how to say "NO" without guilt. This has been as tough as getting off all the unhealthy food. Learning the affects stress has on the entire body has greatly motivated me to push it away. Most of us know it isn't good for us but have no idea what it exactly does. Now that I do I am no longer going to live with stress stealing my health.
God has taught me the importance of faith and trust. He is the air I breath and His word is the well I drink from each day. I know that apart from Him there will be no victory in any area of my life. I've learned the importance of silencing my life so I can hear His voice. He will speak if we will take time to listen.
Family and friends are the anchors in the midst of storms. They are the ones that keep pointing us back to God and who hold us up when we are weak. My family and friends have laughed with me and cried with me and have been my strength when mine has failed. How lonely and frightening this journey would have been without all of you. Your prayers have been heard by our Father! Please don't stop as I know this journey is far from over.
Like the apostle Paul I am learning how to be content in every circumstance and how to find joy in the midst of pain. It really is a choice. When life gets hard we can throw our pity parties and draw into ourselves or we can grab a stone, stand to our feet and face our giant with a God saturated soul. This battle is not mine but God's. My actions and words are going to show the world how big my God is. I am choosing to be an overcomer. These past 6 months I have had greater ministry than in all the years I've been a Christian. My prayer each day is, "Here I am Lord, use me."
I have also learned that taking care of yourself takes time and effort. I no longer allow the busyness of my life to dictate the state of my health. I realize that I have to make my health the second highest priority after my relationship with God. If I don't the people I love the most will pay a high price. What I do now will secure my future health 20-30 years down the road. Most of us never think that far. I do not want to end up with a heart attack, stroke, dementia, Alzheimer's or any number of diseases that afflict us as we age. I believe they are all related to how we are taking care of our bodies now. I do not want to wear diapers, be in a wheelchair, lose my memory, or be placed in a nursing home to finish my days. I want to die quietly in my sleep once I have reached triple digits. The day I die I want to have taken my hour walk, spent some time mentoring someone in the Lord, worked in my garden and visited with my great, great grand kids. I am fully convinced from everything I have read and researched that this is possible if we would only listen to the Lord, be obedient and make our health a highest priority. Taking care of yourself is not a selfish thing to do, it is the best thing you can do for your family and the kingdom of God. You need a healthy body to have long life on this earth to do the work He has called you to do.
Looking back I am so grateful that God gave me the wake up call of cancer. Maybe it is going to prevent the heart attack or other illness that would have killed me. Romans 8:28 says that God works all things for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. Thank you for taking the time to read this and celebrate the good things He is doing in my life!
I have so much to be thankful for. This gift of cancer has radically changed my health. I feel better and look better (so people say) than I have in my entire life. I've lost 30 pounds and no longer say "tomorrow I will start my diet." I feel mentally empowered because I know every single thing I put in my mouth is good for me. I know every organ is being detoxed and getting healthier.
I have been given the opportunity to teach anyone that will listen, including my students, about the dangers of eating all the junk we consume. My own family has started to make some healthy changes. Our 15 year old has not eaten sugar for 4 1/2 months! Go Taryn! Ashley is working at a health food store and is starting to learn more about nutrition and is applying what she's learning it to her life. She is also talking to people who come through her check out line about nutrition and has been able to pass this information on to me. Yesterday I celebrated my 6 months by going to her store and buying some yummy cookies that I can eat that aren't made with sugar, dairy or white flour! Cookies were one of my addictions of choice in my BC days!
For the first time in my life I am getting 8 hours of sleep almost every night. I understand the dangers to the immune system and to the body in general when we are sleep deprived. I no longer get sleepy during the day and I have more energy than I have ever had.
I have learned how to eliminate stress and how to say "NO" without guilt. This has been as tough as getting off all the unhealthy food. Learning the affects stress has on the entire body has greatly motivated me to push it away. Most of us know it isn't good for us but have no idea what it exactly does. Now that I do I am no longer going to live with stress stealing my health.
God has taught me the importance of faith and trust. He is the air I breath and His word is the well I drink from each day. I know that apart from Him there will be no victory in any area of my life. I've learned the importance of silencing my life so I can hear His voice. He will speak if we will take time to listen.
Family and friends are the anchors in the midst of storms. They are the ones that keep pointing us back to God and who hold us up when we are weak. My family and friends have laughed with me and cried with me and have been my strength when mine has failed. How lonely and frightening this journey would have been without all of you. Your prayers have been heard by our Father! Please don't stop as I know this journey is far from over.
Like the apostle Paul I am learning how to be content in every circumstance and how to find joy in the midst of pain. It really is a choice. When life gets hard we can throw our pity parties and draw into ourselves or we can grab a stone, stand to our feet and face our giant with a God saturated soul. This battle is not mine but God's. My actions and words are going to show the world how big my God is. I am choosing to be an overcomer. These past 6 months I have had greater ministry than in all the years I've been a Christian. My prayer each day is, "Here I am Lord, use me."
I have also learned that taking care of yourself takes time and effort. I no longer allow the busyness of my life to dictate the state of my health. I realize that I have to make my health the second highest priority after my relationship with God. If I don't the people I love the most will pay a high price. What I do now will secure my future health 20-30 years down the road. Most of us never think that far. I do not want to end up with a heart attack, stroke, dementia, Alzheimer's or any number of diseases that afflict us as we age. I believe they are all related to how we are taking care of our bodies now. I do not want to wear diapers, be in a wheelchair, lose my memory, or be placed in a nursing home to finish my days. I want to die quietly in my sleep once I have reached triple digits. The day I die I want to have taken my hour walk, spent some time mentoring someone in the Lord, worked in my garden and visited with my great, great grand kids. I am fully convinced from everything I have read and researched that this is possible if we would only listen to the Lord, be obedient and make our health a highest priority. Taking care of yourself is not a selfish thing to do, it is the best thing you can do for your family and the kingdom of God. You need a healthy body to have long life on this earth to do the work He has called you to do.
Looking back I am so grateful that God gave me the wake up call of cancer. Maybe it is going to prevent the heart attack or other illness that would have killed me. Romans 8:28 says that God works all things for good to those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. Thank you for taking the time to read this and celebrate the good things He is doing in my life!
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