God is our Refuge and Strength

On Tuesday night we went to visit Bud (my father-in-law) in the care facility. He was hospitalized in the beginning of September to repair a hematoma that occurred when the doctors replaced the battery on his pace maker. His lung collapsed and they eventually put in a trach so they could help him breathe. He got well enough to be transferred to a rehab facility.
We had just come from Taryn's league final cross country race and she was able to tell dad that she had finished 4th which placed her on the All-League team and qualified her for CIF. Cori and Taryn told him about being voted for homecoming court and the lyp synchs they were in following the football game. We held his hands and prayed for him.
The next morning his heart stopped and he went home to be with the Lord. As you can imagine it was devastating for all of us since they said he was getting better. We were expecting him to come home in a few weeks.
Dad was a sweet man who never complained about anything. He was patient and kind. He always treated me like a daughter and not a daughter-in-law. He was a wonderful grandfather to our girls. We all have great memories of him and we will miss him terribly.
It seems like the weight of cancer and the loss of dad is unbearable. I find comfort in Psalm 46.
"God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear, though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though its waters roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with its swelling.
The Lord of hosts is with us, The God of Jacob is our refuge.
Be still and know that I am God."
These past couple of months have found Sewell and I in the midst of a ferocious storm. It has pounded against our hearts and spirits.
David Jeremiah says in his book A Bend In The Road, " Perhaps the storm is raging for you as you read these words. Perhaps you're lost in a wilderness of shattered hope, or shut away in a prison of debt. Perhaps you face a hospital ward of health concerns, or family problems are rocking your boat and you feel you'll be lost forever.
Wherever you are, whatever the crisis, there is an important principle at work. If you feel helpless, you've become eligible for the assistance of God. You need only cry out for His salvation, He will do the rest in His time, and He'll do it well.
When the storm is over, you'll be a new creature-wiser, stronger, and ready to serve Him. The sea will be calm, the breeze will be soft, and the silence will present itself as a sanctuary to exalt His name and sing His glorious praises. If He can control the storm, what other wonderful works might He bring to pass in your life? Run into His waiting arms, for that's what He most desires. He is your refuge, your city wall, your cool and refreshing stream, and your impenetrable defense from the enemy. He is a very present help in times of trouble."
The only way I am able to put my feet on the floor and face my day is by facing God first. I am trusting God to bring me through this storm and into calm seas. But I won't wait for that moment to praise Him. He loves me and will keep me from sinking no matter how hard the waves pound against my boat. I know this because He's in the boat with me. I am keeping my eyes focused on His face and not the storm. I am thanking Him for His undeniable presence. I don't know how long this storm will rage but it doesn't really matter. I know the longer I am in it, the deeper the work He is doing in my life. I long for the gentle breeze and the calm seas that signal the end of this storm but I will continue to trust Him no matter how long or how hard it beats against my life.
And knowing that my heavenly Father and Bud are together now cheering me on gives me strength and hope to finish this race and finish it strong.