In Southern California we get Santa Ana winds that can gust up to 80 mph. They blew in on Sunday and brought destruction with them. Trees fell, roofs ripped off, fences went down and storage sheds collapsed. Facing winds and giants can be daunting. What do you do when the winds blow into your life unannounced?
You can choose to focus on what you've lost or what you have.
Part of our fence blew down but we have another gate that leads to our side yard so we can still keep our dog Suki in our back yard when we go to work. Our shed that we had painstakingly put together (maybe that was the problem!) is completely destroyed but I am grateful that God has blessed us with the things we put in it. A good part of our roof came off but we have insurance and they can put it back on. What we lost is insignificant in comparison to what we have. At this point we are not one of the 300,000 people that have been evacuated in San Diego due to the fires. Ours is not one of the 1,000 homes that has burned. We are safe, warm and have food in our refrigerator even if the power keeps going on and off.
How you face winds and giants is a matter of what you choose to focus on. When I think of the greatness of the winds that blow into my life or the giants that taunt me, I remind myself of the greatness of my God. He will respond faster than any insurance company to my cry for help.
Psalm 138:3 says, "You answered me, and made me bold with strength in my soul."
Verse 7 says "Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; you will stretch Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and your right hand will save me."
In A Bend In The Road David Jeremiah says, "Every believer knows that when we walk through the valley of tears, God walks beside us; when we pass through the fire, He draws close to deflect the flames; when we wade through the flood, He is nearby to keep our heads up. In the storm or in the earthquake or in the midst of any disaster threatening to engulf us-that's the time we feel the presence of the Lord as we've never felt Him before. God is closest in the crises, surrounding us with His presence. He promised He would do it, and our Lord is always as good as His word."
When the winds blow into your life and you feel like you won't be able to stand, remind yourself of what you have, not what you have lost. Praise him in the middle of the storm. It is your strength to face it.
Tomorrow I am supposed to leave for North Carolina for a 3 day nutrition seminar at the headquarters of Hallelujah Acres. I am following the Hallelujah diet in my quest to beat this cancer. The word Hallelujah literally means "Praise God." I hope I will come back with new knowledge and fresh encouragement to continue on the path God has placed me on. I am very excited because my sister is meeting me at my layover in Houston and we are going together. I have not seen any of my family since I was diagnosed. Thank you to my sweet father for making it possible.
I am praying the fires will not head this direction so I can go with peace in my heart. It is also Sewell's birthday tomorrow and I have never been gone on that day. I am grateful for a husband who loves me and supports me unselfishly.
I am praying that as you read this you will stop and thank God for all the blessings you have even in the midst of the raging storm. You may lose everything you have but you can never be separated from the love of God.
Either we can fall to our knees and lament our circumstances or we can fall to our knees and praise God who is Lord over them.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Thursday, October 18, 2007
He's Holding My Hand
Yesterday I fell. I wasn't standing on a chair. I wasn't out walking. I was sitting in my living room. You might ask how I fell sitting on my couch. Simple. I let go of my Father's hand.
I began to think about this long road I'm on and the difficulty and loneliness of it. Being diagnosed with cancer changes your entire life in one sentence. Nothing will ever be the same. There is a loss and grieving over life as it was.
My birthday is today and I was thinking about celebrating it without hot chocolate for breakfast, chocolate chip cookies for lunch and chocolate cake with ice cream for dinner. As you can tell I love chocolate! Because I know cancer feeds on sugar, I'm not sure I will ever eat it again. On August 29th I was told I had breast cancer. The next day I gave up dairy, all sugar, white flour, and meat. I went to an 85% raw and 15% cooked diet. I began juicing greens and carrots and drinking 6-8 glasses a day of it. This isn't just for this month or until I'm cured. It's for life. Putting cancer into remission does not mean it will not come back in 10-20 years. I know this lifestyle change is not temporary. Yesterday the loneliness of the path I am on and the reality of this disease hit me hard. I cried and cried and felt my hand slipping from His. Even Sewell did not know how to comfort me. I went to bed with a weary and troubled heart. God woke me up at 1:30 this morning. I tried to go back to sleep but couldn't. I came out to the same couch I sat on yesterday when I fell and pulled out my Bible. He directed me to Psalm 18:35-36 "You have also given me the shield of Your salvation, And Your right hand upholds me; And Your gentleness makes me great . You enlarge my steps under me, And my feet have not slipped."
Today is October 18th and God gave me the gift of Psalm 18. It says that when I gave my life to Him my salvation would be my shield. It would protect me. His right hand holds me up and keeps me from falling. His gentleness tells me He understands. I can cry on His shoulder. Because He has a firm grasp on me I may slip but I won't fall and hurt myself. He will hold onto me if I hold onto Him.
Psalm 37:23-24 "The steps of a man are established by the Lord; and He delights in his way. When he falls, he shall not be hurled headlong; because the LORD is the One who holds his hand."
Psalm 63:7-8 "Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you, your right hand upholds me."
Because of the surgery I can't hold onto much with my right hand without causing pain. It's a reminder that even in my weakened emotional state God reaches down and holds onto me tightly as I cling to Him with my soul.
Have you ever been at that place where you have to cling to God? Have you felt the desperation in your Spirit that nothing can comfort? God is faithful and will not let you go. When your heart is troubled run to His word for comfort and strength. You will find it there.
I love Ron Mehl's book God Works the Night Shift. I grabbed it off the book shelf tonight since I wasn't sleeping and here's what he says. "Go ahead and call me simplistic but I think many of us have made this business of walking with the Lord way too complicated. We throw heavy five-syllable, theological terms, come up with all kinds of evangelical checklist, and sometimes make new believers feel they'll have to study Greek, Hebrew and Aramaic before they can really get along in the Christian life. All of that stuff's fine, and I'm grateful for Christian scholars and intellectuals but is it possible that in all our sophistication we've missed the bottom line of life in Jesus? Doesn't the Christian life really boil down to being held by God and, in turn, holding onto Him?"
In Psalm 18:39 it says, "You armed me with strength for battle..."
I am grateful for His strength in the midst of this battle. He knows I don't have any apart from what He gives me.
Each day, wake up, look up at your Father, place your hand in His and hold on for dear life. He won't let you go. You will find strength for your battle.
Sweet dreams!
I began to think about this long road I'm on and the difficulty and loneliness of it. Being diagnosed with cancer changes your entire life in one sentence. Nothing will ever be the same. There is a loss and grieving over life as it was.
My birthday is today and I was thinking about celebrating it without hot chocolate for breakfast, chocolate chip cookies for lunch and chocolate cake with ice cream for dinner. As you can tell I love chocolate! Because I know cancer feeds on sugar, I'm not sure I will ever eat it again. On August 29th I was told I had breast cancer. The next day I gave up dairy, all sugar, white flour, and meat. I went to an 85% raw and 15% cooked diet. I began juicing greens and carrots and drinking 6-8 glasses a day of it. This isn't just for this month or until I'm cured. It's for life. Putting cancer into remission does not mean it will not come back in 10-20 years. I know this lifestyle change is not temporary. Yesterday the loneliness of the path I am on and the reality of this disease hit me hard. I cried and cried and felt my hand slipping from His. Even Sewell did not know how to comfort me. I went to bed with a weary and troubled heart. God woke me up at 1:30 this morning. I tried to go back to sleep but couldn't. I came out to the same couch I sat on yesterday when I fell and pulled out my Bible. He directed me to Psalm 18:35-36 "You have also given me the shield of Your salvation, And Your right hand upholds me; And Your gentleness makes me great . You enlarge my steps under me, And my feet have not slipped."
Today is October 18th and God gave me the gift of Psalm 18. It says that when I gave my life to Him my salvation would be my shield. It would protect me. His right hand holds me up and keeps me from falling. His gentleness tells me He understands. I can cry on His shoulder. Because He has a firm grasp on me I may slip but I won't fall and hurt myself. He will hold onto me if I hold onto Him.
Psalm 37:23-24 "The steps of a man are established by the Lord; and He delights in his way. When he falls, he shall not be hurled headlong; because the LORD is the One who holds his hand."
Psalm 63:7-8 "Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. My soul clings to you, your right hand upholds me."
Because of the surgery I can't hold onto much with my right hand without causing pain. It's a reminder that even in my weakened emotional state God reaches down and holds onto me tightly as I cling to Him with my soul.
Have you ever been at that place where you have to cling to God? Have you felt the desperation in your Spirit that nothing can comfort? God is faithful and will not let you go. When your heart is troubled run to His word for comfort and strength. You will find it there.
I love Ron Mehl's book God Works the Night Shift. I grabbed it off the book shelf tonight since I wasn't sleeping and here's what he says. "Go ahead and call me simplistic but I think many of us have made this business of walking with the Lord way too complicated. We throw heavy five-syllable, theological terms, come up with all kinds of evangelical checklist, and sometimes make new believers feel they'll have to study Greek, Hebrew and Aramaic before they can really get along in the Christian life. All of that stuff's fine, and I'm grateful for Christian scholars and intellectuals but is it possible that in all our sophistication we've missed the bottom line of life in Jesus? Doesn't the Christian life really boil down to being held by God and, in turn, holding onto Him?"
In Psalm 18:39 it says, "You armed me with strength for battle..."
I am grateful for His strength in the midst of this battle. He knows I don't have any apart from what He gives me.
Each day, wake up, look up at your Father, place your hand in His and hold on for dear life. He won't let you go. You will find strength for your battle.
Sweet dreams!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
God is Good
Yesterday I received a call from my surgeon. She told me there wasn't any cancer on the margins of the tumor so they got it all. She removed 17 lymph nodes and there was only cancer in 2 of them! YEAH! I was so excited. I was told before I went into surgery that they may have to remove up to 20 lymph nodes because they are imbedded in fat and they don't know the exact number that are removed until they take them. I was hoping for less but I know God can heal the lymph system so I don't get lymphedema. I am home recovering and hoping to get the drain removed on Friday.
I have been reflecting on all the things God has been doing in and through me. Trials have a way of refining a person. I know there is so much more He is going to do in the days ahead. Meanwhile, I will rest in Him and trust Him with my future.
Psalm 91: 1-2 "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress., my God, in whom I trust."
Please pray for my mom, Sally. She is going into surgery this Thursday(my birthday) to have a 4x5" mass removed in her abdomen. Her heart is not real strong. Sewell's father Bud is starting his 7th week of being in bed with a collapsed lung. They have moved him from ICU to a care facility. He has a trach and is on a ventilator. We are praying his lung will heal enough so he can get off the ventilator and start to get out of bed. He has been on a feeding tube for weeks.
I have been reflecting on all the things God has been doing in and through me. Trials have a way of refining a person. I know there is so much more He is going to do in the days ahead. Meanwhile, I will rest in Him and trust Him with my future.
Psalm 91: 1-2 "He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress., my God, in whom I trust."
Please pray for my mom, Sally. She is going into surgery this Thursday(my birthday) to have a 4x5" mass removed in her abdomen. Her heart is not real strong. Sewell's father Bud is starting his 7th week of being in bed with a collapsed lung. They have moved him from ICU to a care facility. He has a trach and is on a ventilator. We are praying his lung will heal enough so he can get off the ventilator and start to get out of bed. He has been on a feeding tube for weeks.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Facing the Future
Psalm 28:7
"The Lord is my strength and my shield, my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped, therefore my heart greatly rejoices and with my song I will praise Him."
This morning I was reading from Pastor Jeremiah's A Bend In The Road.
He says, "When anxiety for the future built up-and it did time and again-David faced it with the testimony of the past. What a terrible danger it is to become trapped in the claustrophobia of the present during a crisis. That's our first impulse. The clear and present danger is so huge, so imposing, that it blocks our view behind us and ahead of us. We desperately need perspective. We can't change the future until it arrives, but we can gain wisdom from the past. It should hold for us an absolute conviction on the question of who God is and what He's done for us previously."
I don't know what the future holds. I don't know what treatments I will need. The only sure thing I know is God has always been faithful to me in the past and His character does not change. Each day I wake up I know His steadfast love never ceases and His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness. (Lamentations 3:22)
In Habbakuk 3 you can read about a dire situation Habbakuk found himself in. Jeremiah says, "Habbakuk you see, made a choice. His country was in turmoil, his God had no answers that made sense. When there was no explanation for things that he could wrap his mind around, the prophet said, "I do have one option. I can praise God. The world around me may be in turmoil, yet though all of it falls apart, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation." That same choice faces you. You can demand answers, neatly gift-wrapped. You can insist that God quickly resolves every trail and injustice in your life. You can hold out for the world, your life within it, to become suddenly fair and rational, though they've never been so in the first place. Or you can choose to lift up your eyes to the heavens, pour out your tears and grief and anger, and say in the very midst of them, "God, I have no clue what this turmoil is all about or where it is leading, but this is my resolution: I will put my trust in You, and I will praise You with all of my heart unconditionally!" The same God who has been there in the past is the God who is going to be there for you in the future. He will bring resolution in His own time, according to His own purposes. We become preoccupied with our circumstances, God is preoccupied with our character. He will allow the tough times for the higher good of our character until He is finished with the great work that is invisible to our earthly eyes."
My prayer for you and I is that each day we will get up and reflect on God's faithfulness. He has what we need to get through this day and each that is to come. May you embrace your day with joy and unconditional praise. Don't fear the future. He holds it in His hands. He is molding and shaping your character. Look for the ministry opportunities He will bring your way. Find the purpose in the pain. It's there. Like David, I choose to say, "I will sing to the Lord, for He has been good to me." Psalm 13:6
"The Lord is my strength and my shield, my heart trusted in Him, and I am helped, therefore my heart greatly rejoices and with my song I will praise Him."
This morning I was reading from Pastor Jeremiah's A Bend In The Road.
He says, "When anxiety for the future built up-and it did time and again-David faced it with the testimony of the past. What a terrible danger it is to become trapped in the claustrophobia of the present during a crisis. That's our first impulse. The clear and present danger is so huge, so imposing, that it blocks our view behind us and ahead of us. We desperately need perspective. We can't change the future until it arrives, but we can gain wisdom from the past. It should hold for us an absolute conviction on the question of who God is and what He's done for us previously."
I don't know what the future holds. I don't know what treatments I will need. The only sure thing I know is God has always been faithful to me in the past and His character does not change. Each day I wake up I know His steadfast love never ceases and His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is His faithfulness. (Lamentations 3:22)
In Habbakuk 3 you can read about a dire situation Habbakuk found himself in. Jeremiah says, "Habbakuk you see, made a choice. His country was in turmoil, his God had no answers that made sense. When there was no explanation for things that he could wrap his mind around, the prophet said, "I do have one option. I can praise God. The world around me may be in turmoil, yet though all of it falls apart, I will rejoice in the God of my salvation." That same choice faces you. You can demand answers, neatly gift-wrapped. You can insist that God quickly resolves every trail and injustice in your life. You can hold out for the world, your life within it, to become suddenly fair and rational, though they've never been so in the first place. Or you can choose to lift up your eyes to the heavens, pour out your tears and grief and anger, and say in the very midst of them, "God, I have no clue what this turmoil is all about or where it is leading, but this is my resolution: I will put my trust in You, and I will praise You with all of my heart unconditionally!" The same God who has been there in the past is the God who is going to be there for you in the future. He will bring resolution in His own time, according to His own purposes. We become preoccupied with our circumstances, God is preoccupied with our character. He will allow the tough times for the higher good of our character until He is finished with the great work that is invisible to our earthly eyes."
My prayer for you and I is that each day we will get up and reflect on God's faithfulness. He has what we need to get through this day and each that is to come. May you embrace your day with joy and unconditional praise. Don't fear the future. He holds it in His hands. He is molding and shaping your character. Look for the ministry opportunities He will bring your way. Find the purpose in the pain. It's there. Like David, I choose to say, "I will sing to the Lord, for He has been good to me." Psalm 13:6
Thursday, October 11, 2007
An Army Of Prayer Warriors
Yeah! I am through surgery and resting at home. Sewell and I got up early and drove to La Jolla Cove so we could walk along the ocean before surgery. I have always felt God's presence when I look at the waves, seagulls and seals. I took all the scripture cards I was given and read them. I had to have a wire put in to the tumor to be able to guide the surgeon. That was pretty painful but I kept reciting a verse from Habbakuk that talks about God being my personal bravery. I was able to talk to the anesthesiologist about how I usually get sick when I wake up from surgery. She gave me something during surgery and then a drip all day after surgery and I didn't throw up! My surgeon told me she knew I wasn't going to do chemo or radiation and how I was concerned about the lymph nodes. She said she would be as conservative as she could be and yet get the ones she thought looked enlarged. I prayed with her and asked God to guide her and give her wisdom. She was very encouraged by the prayer. I didn't have much pain yesterday after surgery and didn't have to take any pain medication. I do have a drain from the lymph nodes that I have to empty. There just isn't any good way to attach that thing to your body. :)
I saw my doctor today and she said the lump was very small and she only took the lymph nodes that looked enlarged. She told me she had my voice in her head during surgery about keeping the lymph nodes. I wonder who could have put it there? :) It was a direct answer to the prayer I prayed with her before going in. She also said she left the blood vessels which they usually take. I had a beautiful room overlooking the golf course with a view of the ocean. I could see about 10 hang gliders out taking a ride. They just seemed to float so effortlessly along. Sewell and I have gone to the cliffs above the ocean many times to watch them take off and land. I've always thought it would be great to take a tandem ride. The novice sits in front and the expert sits in back and takes control. As I watched them out my window it was as if God was reminding me that on this journey he would guide me and carry me. I can sit back and relax, trusting His ablility to bring me in for a safe landing. He is in charge. I am certainly a novice at trying to figure out how to cure cancer through nutrition but God is the expert. He will faithfully guide me.
I was able to talk to my roommate about what the Lord is doing in my life through cancer and pray for her recovery from the knee surgery she had.
I know that there were hundreds of people praying for me yesterday. I could feel those prayers comforting me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. God is so good. Now I wait for the pathology report, try to rest and recover and read the two books I have left about curing cancer with nutrition. Please continue to pray God will reveal the answer to me for my complete healing.
I saw my doctor today and she said the lump was very small and she only took the lymph nodes that looked enlarged. She told me she had my voice in her head during surgery about keeping the lymph nodes. I wonder who could have put it there? :) It was a direct answer to the prayer I prayed with her before going in. She also said she left the blood vessels which they usually take. I had a beautiful room overlooking the golf course with a view of the ocean. I could see about 10 hang gliders out taking a ride. They just seemed to float so effortlessly along. Sewell and I have gone to the cliffs above the ocean many times to watch them take off and land. I've always thought it would be great to take a tandem ride. The novice sits in front and the expert sits in back and takes control. As I watched them out my window it was as if God was reminding me that on this journey he would guide me and carry me. I can sit back and relax, trusting His ablility to bring me in for a safe landing. He is in charge. I am certainly a novice at trying to figure out how to cure cancer through nutrition but God is the expert. He will faithfully guide me.
I was able to talk to my roommate about what the Lord is doing in my life through cancer and pray for her recovery from the knee surgery she had.
I know that there were hundreds of people praying for me yesterday. I could feel those prayers comforting me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. God is so good. Now I wait for the pathology report, try to rest and recover and read the two books I have left about curing cancer with nutrition. Please continue to pray God will reveal the answer to me for my complete healing.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
In His Care
Well, the day has arrived. Surgery is at 10:30 this morning and should last about 3 hours. This will be my 5th surgery for various things. I don't think any of us like going through surgery. I have not had very good experiences with anesthesia. The whole process and recovery makes me kind of anxious.
This morning I was reading Psalm 94:17-19 "Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, "My foot is slipping," your love, O Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul."
I know my Shepherd goes before me and leads me. He restores my soul. He comforts me.When I am in the operating room He will be watching. His angels will be with Him to attend to me. There is great comfort knowing I will not be alone. Your prayers will be guiding the surgeon's hands. I am and will continue to have a peace that can only be given by my Heavenly Father.
I was so comforted by the kind responses to my writing yesterday. Complete strangers wrote to encourage me! Just yesterday I was prayed for by the teachers at my school, my advisory girls had the entire student body pray for me during our chapel, two students gave me books, one student got out of a class to come find me to give me a hug and tell me she was praying for me, a friend sent a Bible study to me, my mom and dad both sent me something in the mail which is the first time that has probably ever happened in my life, a friend brought some beautiful pink roses to me and scripture cards, another friend did all my xeroxing for my classes, several friends left encouraging messages on my phone, I received 4 movie tickets and a gift card in the mail, my Bible study group all prayed for me and loved on me and I was told that I am on many, many prayer chains! How can I not feel encouraged through all of that? And I know it was God who prompted each person's heart to reach out to me. I want to thank all of you who have so graciously thought of me and ministered to me. I wish I could reach out and give you a hug. Thank you for wrapping me in your love and prayers. It is very appreciated.
I am excited to see what ministry opportunities await at the hospital. I know I am His ambassador! I am going to pray for anyone that will let me including my surgeon and anesthesiologist.
Today as you face your day, know that God will send His comfort and peace no matter what is ahead for you. Run, don't walk into His arms. He has more than enough strength to help you face the day and all of your tomorrows.
This morning I was reading Psalm 94:17-19 "Unless the Lord had given me help, I would soon have dwelt in the silence of death. When I said, "My foot is slipping," your love, O Lord, supported me. When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul."
I know my Shepherd goes before me and leads me. He restores my soul. He comforts me.When I am in the operating room He will be watching. His angels will be with Him to attend to me. There is great comfort knowing I will not be alone. Your prayers will be guiding the surgeon's hands. I am and will continue to have a peace that can only be given by my Heavenly Father.
I was so comforted by the kind responses to my writing yesterday. Complete strangers wrote to encourage me! Just yesterday I was prayed for by the teachers at my school, my advisory girls had the entire student body pray for me during our chapel, two students gave me books, one student got out of a class to come find me to give me a hug and tell me she was praying for me, a friend sent a Bible study to me, my mom and dad both sent me something in the mail which is the first time that has probably ever happened in my life, a friend brought some beautiful pink roses to me and scripture cards, another friend did all my xeroxing for my classes, several friends left encouraging messages on my phone, I received 4 movie tickets and a gift card in the mail, my Bible study group all prayed for me and loved on me and I was told that I am on many, many prayer chains! How can I not feel encouraged through all of that? And I know it was God who prompted each person's heart to reach out to me. I want to thank all of you who have so graciously thought of me and ministered to me. I wish I could reach out and give you a hug. Thank you for wrapping me in your love and prayers. It is very appreciated.
I am excited to see what ministry opportunities await at the hospital. I know I am His ambassador! I am going to pray for anyone that will let me including my surgeon and anesthesiologist.
Today as you face your day, know that God will send His comfort and peace no matter what is ahead for you. Run, don't walk into His arms. He has more than enough strength to help you face the day and all of your tomorrows.
Monday, October 8, 2007
Trusting In The Lord
I have always trusted in the Lord but it is only since I have been diagnosed with cancer that I have truly come to know the full meaning of Proverbs 3:5-6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight." The road of cancer is not a straight one. There are forks in the road and choices must be made. These are not simple choices that are inconsequential but they are choices of life and death. This reality at times causes me to want to trust other people to make the choice for me. It would be easier than wading through tons of research, web sites and other information. And yet I know God is the only one who knows what the correct choice is for my life. It is much harder to hear God's voice speaking than man's. His voice is the one that will put me on the path of healing. As I have sought alternative methods to healing cancer I have come to realize there are hundreds if not thousands of options. Which one(s) will work? Knowing I do not have the knowledge to make this decision could cause fear and panic to set in. So I go to God's word and I am comforted by scriptures like Proverbs 3 that says He will make our paths straight.
Another one I cling to is Isaiah 30:20-21 "Although the Lord gives you the bread of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."
I am trusting God to bring the people into my life who will teach me and help direct my path towards complete healing.
Do you have choices you need to make? My encouragement to you is create a daily time where you listen. Mine happens to be from 4:30-5:30 a.m. each day. This is the only time there is complete silence in my home. When I stop the noise of life I can hear his voice. When do you stop the noise of your life to kneel at His feet and quiet your spirit so you can listen? Listening is a discipline in our spiritual lives that many of us do not exercise.
Proverbs 4:1 says, "Listen, my sons, to a father's instruction; pay attention and gain understanding."
Your Heavenly father is longing to speak to you because He loves you. Have confidence that He will not leave you alone to make your choices in life. He will be behind you whispering, "This is the way, walk in it."
Another one I cling to is Isaiah 30:20-21 "Although the Lord gives you the bread of affliction, your teachers will be hidden no more; with your own eyes you will see them. Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it."
I am trusting God to bring the people into my life who will teach me and help direct my path towards complete healing.
Do you have choices you need to make? My encouragement to you is create a daily time where you listen. Mine happens to be from 4:30-5:30 a.m. each day. This is the only time there is complete silence in my home. When I stop the noise of life I can hear his voice. When do you stop the noise of your life to kneel at His feet and quiet your spirit so you can listen? Listening is a discipline in our spiritual lives that many of us do not exercise.
Proverbs 4:1 says, "Listen, my sons, to a father's instruction; pay attention and gain understanding."
Your Heavenly father is longing to speak to you because He loves you. Have confidence that He will not leave you alone to make your choices in life. He will be behind you whispering, "This is the way, walk in it."
Friday, October 5, 2007
The Rush of Angels Wings
I encourage you to read this mornings blog before reading this one.
Today I had 10 pairs of angels wings rushing in to comfort and encourage me. Each teacher at Christian High has been assigned to meet daily for 15 minutes with a group of students. I meet with 10 of the most precious senior girls. Today when I met with them they were all wearing hot pink bracelets that said "Facing Your Giant" "Mrs. Dunton." They have purchased 200 of them and got permission from our superintendent to sell them for donations to the students on our campus for my "carrot juice fund." They said they know there are extra expenses at this time and they want to help. As you can imagine I just broke down and cried. My mind quickly raced back to a few weeks ago when they made me close my eyes while they did something. When I opened my eyes they were all sitting with little cups of carrot juice that they drank in support of me. It was another tearful moment. I thank God for using young teenage ladies to be His angels rushing in with hope and encouragement. Thank you Brooke, Kaylyn, Alyssa, Brittany, Sharon, Sarah, Amanda, Danielle, Rebecca and Cathy. I love you all! And thank you God for choosing these girls to be part of my advisory.
What is really amazing is that for 6 years I have been a freshman advisor and this year the administration gave me seniors! God knew I would be facing this breast cancer giant and these would be the teens He would minister His love through. I have taught all of them in the past. Together we will mture as women of the Lord, strengthening and praying for each other. I am excited to see the growth that will take place in each of our lives as we journey together this year.
Today I had 10 pairs of angels wings rushing in to comfort and encourage me. Each teacher at Christian High has been assigned to meet daily for 15 minutes with a group of students. I meet with 10 of the most precious senior girls. Today when I met with them they were all wearing hot pink bracelets that said "Facing Your Giant" "Mrs. Dunton." They have purchased 200 of them and got permission from our superintendent to sell them for donations to the students on our campus for my "carrot juice fund." They said they know there are extra expenses at this time and they want to help. As you can imagine I just broke down and cried. My mind quickly raced back to a few weeks ago when they made me close my eyes while they did something. When I opened my eyes they were all sitting with little cups of carrot juice that they drank in support of me. It was another tearful moment. I thank God for using young teenage ladies to be His angels rushing in with hope and encouragement. Thank you Brooke, Kaylyn, Alyssa, Brittany, Sharon, Sarah, Amanda, Danielle, Rebecca and Cathy. I love you all! And thank you God for choosing these girls to be part of my advisory.
What is really amazing is that for 6 years I have been a freshman advisor and this year the administration gave me seniors! God knew I would be facing this breast cancer giant and these would be the teens He would minister His love through. I have taught all of them in the past. Together we will mture as women of the Lord, strengthening and praying for each other. I am excited to see the growth that will take place in each of our lives as we journey together this year.
The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me!
This morning in my devotions this is what I read.
"The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me..." Psalm 138:8
"There is a divine mystery in suffering, one that has a strange and supernatural power and has never been completely understood by human reason. No one has ever developed a deep level of spirituality or holiness without experiencing a great deal of suffering. When a person who suffers reaches a point where he can be calm and carefree, inwardly smiling at his own suffering, and no longer asking God to be delivered from it, then the suffering has accomplished its blessed ministry, perseverance has "finished its work" (James 1:4) and the pain of the Crucifixion has begun to weave itself into a crown.
It is in this experience of complete suffering that the Holy Spirit works many miraculous things deep within our soul. In this condition, our entire being lies perfectly still under the hand of God; every power and ability of the mind, will and heart are at last submissive; a quietness of eternity settles into the entire soul; and finally, the mouth becomes quiet, having only a few words to say, and stops crying out to God, why have you forsaken me?" Psalm 22:1)
At this point the person stops imagining castles in the sky, and pursuing foolish ideas and his reasoning becomes calm and relaxed, with all choices removed, because the only choice has now become the purpose of God. Also, his emotions are weaned away from other people and things, becoming deadened so that nothing can hurt, offend, hinder, or get in his way. He can now let the circumstances be what they may, and continue to seek only God and His will, with the calm assurance that He is causing everything in the universe, whether good or bad, past or present, to work "for the good of those who love him" (Romans 8:28).
Oh, the blessings of absolute submission to Christ! What a blessing to lose our own strength, wisdom, plans and desires and to be where every ounce of our being becomes like a peaceful Sea of Galilee under the omnipotent feet of Jesus! The main thing is to suffer without becoming discouraged. "
The heart that serves, and loves, and clings,
Hears everywhere the rush of angel wings.
I have only been on this journey for 2 months but I am beginning to reach the point of being calm and of inwardly rejoicing over what God is doing in and through me at this time. I sense a quietness of eternity settling into my soul. I am seeking God's perfect will for me with the assurance He will cause this to work together for His good and glory. Everyday I sense the rush of angels wings as He sends them to minister comfort, hope and encouragement to my heart.
Each day, give your life to God. Look to Him to be the stillness in your storm. Lay your cares and concerns at His feet. There is nothing to difficult for Him. He can heal any heart and any body. He will keep you in perfect peace if you completely trust Him.
"The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me..." Psalm 138:8
"There is a divine mystery in suffering, one that has a strange and supernatural power and has never been completely understood by human reason. No one has ever developed a deep level of spirituality or holiness without experiencing a great deal of suffering. When a person who suffers reaches a point where he can be calm and carefree, inwardly smiling at his own suffering, and no longer asking God to be delivered from it, then the suffering has accomplished its blessed ministry, perseverance has "finished its work" (James 1:4) and the pain of the Crucifixion has begun to weave itself into a crown.
It is in this experience of complete suffering that the Holy Spirit works many miraculous things deep within our soul. In this condition, our entire being lies perfectly still under the hand of God; every power and ability of the mind, will and heart are at last submissive; a quietness of eternity settles into the entire soul; and finally, the mouth becomes quiet, having only a few words to say, and stops crying out to God, why have you forsaken me?" Psalm 22:1)
At this point the person stops imagining castles in the sky, and pursuing foolish ideas and his reasoning becomes calm and relaxed, with all choices removed, because the only choice has now become the purpose of God. Also, his emotions are weaned away from other people and things, becoming deadened so that nothing can hurt, offend, hinder, or get in his way. He can now let the circumstances be what they may, and continue to seek only God and His will, with the calm assurance that He is causing everything in the universe, whether good or bad, past or present, to work "for the good of those who love him" (Romans 8:28).
Oh, the blessings of absolute submission to Christ! What a blessing to lose our own strength, wisdom, plans and desires and to be where every ounce of our being becomes like a peaceful Sea of Galilee under the omnipotent feet of Jesus! The main thing is to suffer without becoming discouraged. "
The heart that serves, and loves, and clings,
Hears everywhere the rush of angel wings.
I have only been on this journey for 2 months but I am beginning to reach the point of being calm and of inwardly rejoicing over what God is doing in and through me at this time. I sense a quietness of eternity settling into my soul. I am seeking God's perfect will for me with the assurance He will cause this to work together for His good and glory. Everyday I sense the rush of angels wings as He sends them to minister comfort, hope and encouragement to my heart.
Each day, give your life to God. Look to Him to be the stillness in your storm. Lay your cares and concerns at His feet. There is nothing to difficult for Him. He can heal any heart and any body. He will keep you in perfect peace if you completely trust Him.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Peace While Facing A Giant
"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal." Isaiah 26:3-4
This past month I have been diligently researching my options for treatment. I have talked to 10 doctors, read 9 books on nutrition and cancer, had 7 diagnostic medical procedures and spoken to over 2 dozen people to hear their stories and seek advice.
Every day I have asked God to direct me down the correct path for my healing. I believe He is. Yesterday I met with a cancer specialist and received the final confirmation about surgery. I will go ahead with the lumpectomy next Wednesday at Scripps Green in San Diego. They will also be doing a conservative Axillary Lymph Node Dissection to remove a sample of lymph nodes since there is cancer in at least one. I will be at home resting and recovering for 12-14 days.
When I met with the cancer specialist he told me I was on the right track with my nutrition and vitamin therapy. They will do some further testing after surgery to determine the cause of cancer and begin to address any weak areas in my system. On October 24th I will be flying back to North Carolina for a 3 day seminar to find out more about healing cancer through nutrition. At this point I am not going to do chemotherapy or radiation. Continue to pray God will fine tune what I am doing with my nutrition in order to kill all the cancer cells in my body.
It is because of prayers and support from my friends and family that Sewell and I have the peace we do at this point. We will continue to seek counsel from experts in the field because the Bible says there is wisdom in the abundance of counselors. But mostly we will seek the counsel of our Heavenly Father who is the only one that knows my future and the plan for my complete healing. I believe He is revealing it to us day by day.
Thank you for reading these posts, leaving your encouraging comments and praying for us. We are so glad you are part of our winning team.
This past month I have been diligently researching my options for treatment. I have talked to 10 doctors, read 9 books on nutrition and cancer, had 7 diagnostic medical procedures and spoken to over 2 dozen people to hear their stories and seek advice.
Every day I have asked God to direct me down the correct path for my healing. I believe He is. Yesterday I met with a cancer specialist and received the final confirmation about surgery. I will go ahead with the lumpectomy next Wednesday at Scripps Green in San Diego. They will also be doing a conservative Axillary Lymph Node Dissection to remove a sample of lymph nodes since there is cancer in at least one. I will be at home resting and recovering for 12-14 days.
When I met with the cancer specialist he told me I was on the right track with my nutrition and vitamin therapy. They will do some further testing after surgery to determine the cause of cancer and begin to address any weak areas in my system. On October 24th I will be flying back to North Carolina for a 3 day seminar to find out more about healing cancer through nutrition. At this point I am not going to do chemotherapy or radiation. Continue to pray God will fine tune what I am doing with my nutrition in order to kill all the cancer cells in my body.
It is because of prayers and support from my friends and family that Sewell and I have the peace we do at this point. We will continue to seek counsel from experts in the field because the Bible says there is wisdom in the abundance of counselors. But mostly we will seek the counsel of our Heavenly Father who is the only one that knows my future and the plan for my complete healing. I believe He is revealing it to us day by day.
Thank you for reading these posts, leaving your encouraging comments and praying for us. We are so glad you are part of our winning team.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Take Goliath Down
"He vies for the bedside position, hoping to be the first voice you hear. He covets your waking thoughts, those early, pillow born emotions. He awakes you with words of worry, stirs you with thoughts of stress. If you dread the day before you begin the day, mark it down: your giant has been by your bed.
You face giants by facing God first.
Write today's worries in sand. Chisel yesterday's victories in stone. ...before ascending to fight, David descended to prepare. Don't face your giant without doing the same. Dedicate time to prayer.
Prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Ephesians 6:18 Message Bible
When David soaked his mind in God, he stood. When he didn't he flopped. David saw Goliath as a chance for God to show off! Did David know he would exit the battle alive? No, but he was willing to give his life for he reputation of God. What if you saw your giant in the same manner? Rather than begrude him, welcome him. Your cancer is God's chance to flex his healing muscles. David ran, not away from, but toward his giant. Do the same!"
As I read these words in Chapter 19 of Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado I was again reminded of the importance of running to the battle equipped with His promises to me. Each day before I get out of bed I focus on God. Yes, the giant is still there but I choose not to focus my attention on it. Focusing on giants will cause stress and rob us of our joy. Each day we can pick up our 5 stones and face our Goliaths. We can choose to focus on God's faithfulness in the past, the power available through prayer, the priority of God's reputation, running with passion towards our giant and persisting by never giving up. I believe I will exit this battle alive but I am willing to give my life for the reputation of God. I believe the cancer will be God's chance to flex His healing muscles in my life. I am trusting God with my life because I know He loves me.
You face giants by facing God first.
Write today's worries in sand. Chisel yesterday's victories in stone. ...before ascending to fight, David descended to prepare. Don't face your giant without doing the same. Dedicate time to prayer.
Prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Ephesians 6:18 Message Bible
When David soaked his mind in God, he stood. When he didn't he flopped. David saw Goliath as a chance for God to show off! Did David know he would exit the battle alive? No, but he was willing to give his life for he reputation of God. What if you saw your giant in the same manner? Rather than begrude him, welcome him. Your cancer is God's chance to flex his healing muscles. David ran, not away from, but toward his giant. Do the same!"
As I read these words in Chapter 19 of Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado I was again reminded of the importance of running to the battle equipped with His promises to me. Each day before I get out of bed I focus on God. Yes, the giant is still there but I choose not to focus my attention on it. Focusing on giants will cause stress and rob us of our joy. Each day we can pick up our 5 stones and face our Goliaths. We can choose to focus on God's faithfulness in the past, the power available through prayer, the priority of God's reputation, running with passion towards our giant and persisting by never giving up. I believe I will exit this battle alive but I am willing to give my life for the reputation of God. I believe the cancer will be God's chance to flex His healing muscles in my life. I am trusting God with my life because I know He loves me.
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